Thursday, August 27, 2009

You're kidding, right?

Holy crap.. could it be? Am I actually posting TWICE within the same week? Wow, I must have turned over a new leaf or something! Or maybe I'm just really bored. We'll go with the new leaf thing, because then it makes it sound like I'm making positive strides in my life, which don't get me wrong, I am, but I am still just really bored.

So I attempted to make jam the other day. I got the recipe out of a "Self" magazine that had Zooey Deschanel on the cover. I love her, and she's extremely attractive. It was my first time ever trying to make jam, but what I didn't realize is how long it would take. Three hours! Can you believe that crap? I eventually got fed up near the end that intead of letting the strawberries fully melt, I just mushed them up with my spoon. Oops. Ah well, it still tastes pretty good. I mean, it smells horrendous, but it doesn't taste too bad! Not like that time I made bread. I still don't know what when wrong.

I got this book out of the library called "Ultimate Bread", because it sounded pretty badass. Ultimate Bread? I mean, that's epic. That's saying that there is absolutely NO BREAD better than this bread. I had to make this ultimate bread, I just had to. So I look through the recipes, and if you know me, you know that I have a weakness for baguette. It's the only good thing to come out of France. French people, please ignore the blatant American racism. Thank you. So I attempted to make it, and I followed the directions perfectly, or so I thought. Well, when it came out, it wound up having an almost rock hard crust. Coincidentally, it also looked like a rock. It also tasted like matza. I have no idea how it could taste like matza, because I didn't forget to put in the yeast like those wandering Jewish folks in the desert. It was a sad day. My dreams were crushed. I've never been quite the same.

Still, the jam was pretty good.

I need to go to the store and buy some clothes, but I am so picky when it comes to buying things. I'm like Ebenezer Scrooge with my money, because I hate spending it so much. Seriously, when it costs $50 dollars for a shirt, you are thinking, okay, I just worked a full day to buy this shirt. It's bull crap! That's why I hate buying clothes, and hence why I don't have a huge selection of clothes in my closet. It's not like I don't have the money to buy it.. I just really really don't want to spend it. It's terrible, but I suppose I have to get over it. I'm about to head out to the mall, so we'll see how I do.

Alright you cool cats, thanks for reading. Peace!


Brian said...

FYI, your French statement isn't racist. There's no such thing as the "French race". Instead, you should have said that your statement was xenophobic........Friendo.

Brandon said...

My bad.